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A Rainbow of Spirituality

Managing Grief

All of experience times when we mourn a loss or must reach out to others in need.  For some, asking for help or extending sympathy comes easily, but many wonder what to do and/or say.  From my experience in my life personally, as as a healer, I recommend the following guidelines.

Time:
Be careful not to rush the grieving process, which varies for each individual.  If intense grief persists after eight weeks, preventing normal functioning, seek help through a spiritual teacher, guide or through counseling or a support group, (such as different forums) or a local social service agency.

Talk:
In the days and months following a loss, the bereaved may want to share feelings with trusted friends or family members, who should listen and not try to fix everything.  Offering genuine condolences of "I'm sorry" or "I care" is helpful.  However, avoid trying to explain why something happened or saying, "I know how you must feel," since explanations or seemingly insincere comments rarely console.

Touch:
When people are experiencing a loss, it's important that they tell someone if they need a hug.  Also, for some people, having a pet for company can bring great comfort.

Tears:
Cry, alone or with a friend, silent or aloud - whatever helps to release built-up frustrations, grief, or anger.  Many mean are often reluctant to show their emotions, and some women worry that crying shows a lack of faith.  Crying can be very helpful and should not be viewed as a weakness. 

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